Ranks of Campus Denizen in New England:
ROTC: You got top marks, but went to college instead. You’re a CIA, a ground agent.
MKULTRA: Your father was CIA, out of a boot camp, for government spies. You are a confidential informant.
State Police Capo: You were an ROTC, that sold drugs. You manage an art program.
Professor: An ROTC, MKULTRA, or State Police Capo, lured you into drug dealing. You can teach at college.
Bar Exam: You’re a professor, that busted a corrupt law agent, law informant, or bar exam, and now, you’re a prosecutor. You caught an anti-police spy, from out of state.
Politician: You personally busted, someone cheating the bar examination. You took theology, at a state university, for municipal election.
Jesuit: You cheated, one of the rules above, the Catholics determined you were a child molester. You went to a Jesuit university or training program, thinking you were clergy, but in fact they gave you a permanent criminal insanity disorder, you ate your own shit as a child. You move in with your parents.
Military Officer: You busted the Jesuit, in any way shape or form, and your kids, can now be military officers, in any of the five services (Air Force, Marines, Army, Navy, Langley).