UMass-Amherst Terms Per Drug (For a Snitch)

Marijuana: “Jew”. You’ve come from off campus, attempting to take over crime, as if it’s a video game or movie.

LSD: “Kyke”. You bought LSD off someone, then snitched them out, because you thought you were an item (dating or engaged), and it turned out, it was a business arrangement.

Shrooms: “Mussulman”. You bought shrooms and snitched to the police that you had a bad trip, but blamed the worst victim of the shrooms because you can’t remember who bought them.

Cigarettes: “Kim Philby”. You want your room mate to smoke outside, so we frame you as a communist.

Beer: “Gutter”. You think it’s really cool to drink, so you talk about it to your parents, and we put you in a fake fraternity or sorority, that’s actually a James Bond training program for the man you snitched out as drinking beer with you.

Hard Liquor: “James Beam”. You whine to a professor or doctor or RA about noise when people are drunk, or call the cops, so we make you a TA in charge of recruiting political science majors that are Republican, to be economists.

Cocaine: “Shithead”. You sold cocaine in the dorms, instead of the fraternities, so we have Jews and African-Americans and Latinos and Asian gangsters take your cocaine, over and over again, plying upon your sense of racist shame at your computer being turned off its connection (you looked at pornography of a black woman).

Heroin: “Nietzsche”. You wanted to kill heroin dealers for being FBI agents hunting out-of-state police for mayors, so we got you a Jesuit scholarship, now you’re batshit stupid, you did drugs, remember?

Islam: “David the Gnome”. You converted someone named David to Islam, to make him a slave, so we have the entire chess team go three way on you, and have your own syndicate rob you at gunpoint, for being an Israeli Mossad.

Cocktails: “Citizen Drunk”. You drank a wine cooler or mixer in clear view of your room mate, and you are now frauded into the teacher program, by a gay man or woman on campus. Why are you drinking like you’re in your 50’s, man?

Crack: “Crack is Whack”. You talked about crack, so we send you to the “Old Jew”, the Gentile or Goyim that seems Jewish because he’s evil, and he gives you his cigar, that you assume is packed with ‘high power hydro’. He says it’s not, because, ‘that guy is racist’, and when it turns out to be a stogie, packed with tobacco, it turns out, you were racist – to the Jews.

Published by cheater120

Consider me an expert in information munitions. I practice Zazen meditation, Yakuza Trappist form (a Yakuza, games cheat, and Trappist, a counter-agent), as a Bonafuda, a mercantile salesmen of information through philosophy, literature, fiction, and academics, distributed as munitions technique deployed for the purpose apparent to you, unless of course you have violated the ethics of my piece, in which case you will be trapped inside a theft of the piece and an action within the boundaries of the violation you have committed in Benedictine culture, the Jewish affiliate within Catholic culture. Buyer beware, and these poems, are free.

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